to move or not to move - that is the question???

So we have been thinking a lot about our pro's and con's with this whole moving situation. Right now we are leaning more towards not moving just yet. this is a huge relief to me right now, as I was feeling so very overwhelmed with the whole thing. Nothing is set in stone and there is a chance something may change - AGAIN. But for now, I am going to spend the summer with the kids doing fun stuff. continue organizing and getting rid of things.

Today is day 13 of our ~ No Eating Out for 30 Days ~ Challenge and so far so good! Yesterday I made: Clam Chowder, Baked Potato Soup, a batch of Taco meat, a desert, Pizza Crust Dough and one white chicken pizza (2 more crusts left) and I boiled 18 eggs for egg salad sandwiches. I have never made home made pizza crust before and was amazed at how easy it was! If I can just get my thickness and the shape of the crust right - I don't think I will do it any other way!~

That Dirty "M" word

MOVING - ugh I thought we were done. We seriously had decided to stay in this house  (insert little boy from the movie The Sandlot) FOR EV ER. My oldest is 7 years away from 18, Bailey is only two years behind that. We wanted to travel and be able to have the freedom to do what we please, when we please, and we could do that in this house.

We are just now coming to the conclusion that this was never our house, wish we would have come to that conclusion before we put a crap load of money into our "rental."  I do hope my "mother" just saying that word makes me throw up in my mouth a little, enjoys all the upgrades to this house. Of course I don't think she will because I don't see how she can pay the mortgage payment without a J.O.B.

On the up side we have found a beautiful NEW construction home- bigger mortgage, less projects, I am all for it. After going through the receipts of all the projects, upkeep on this house - sod, sprinklers, construction, concrete, fencing, etc, we could pretty much double our mortgage payment. The new house has it all and more.

So for now - I am stressing, packing, cleaning, organizing, stressing some more, getting ready for a HUGE yard sale and stressing some more.
The kids are both wrecks. They will be going to new schools in a new much larger town. I am trying to be as patient as possible. I honestly think this will be a great change. I think it will be easier for me to make the changes that I have been wanting to make in my life. I know that my kids will be fine and I wouldn't consider making this move if I didn't.

I am going to focus on the positive:
* NEW house
*3 bedroom 2 full bath (in working order)
*3 car garage
* Fully fenced, mature lawn, auto sprinklers
*pantry, linen closet, coat closet-three things that this house lacks that I would LOVE!
* house has a country feel, while still being in a sub-division meaning it has a paved street, sidewalks, etc
* larger city with more than one grocery store, that stays open later than 8pm!
*PIZZA DELIVERY!! to my DOOR! awesomeness!

I am hoping to move at the end of July giving me plenty of time to get packed, move, unpack and get settled before the kids start their new school on August 17th.
My courage for the week:

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.

a change of heart

I was pretty sure I was going to give up on blogging. I was positive this just wasn't for me. Life is too busy. Life is too complicated. But I really need an outlet, especially these days. So here I go, prepare yourself.

We moved my step-son here with his pregnant girlfriend March 1st.  We didn't realize that she had a bench warrant for her arrest. She acted like she wanted to take care of it.  19 days of living here and then she went to her moms for Spring Break and was supposed to turn herself in, get bailed out and then we would help her with her fine. She never came back, nor has she taken care of her issues. My step-son moved back to Utah on the 9th of this month. They are living with his mom who is okay with them not taking care of these issues, which is why they moved here in the first place! It was an emotional month. I know that with them living there I don't have much chance of being any part of this babies life.

It is nice however to have my house back to ourselves. My kids seem to have gone through their emotional roller coaster - the one they always go through when their brother moves here - life is turned upside down - brother moves away - etc...

Two weeks ago our business partner came home and decided he didn't like the way I was running the business and fired me. seeing as how we both own the same amount of the company - I am pretty sure he can't fire me. However I am pretty much ready for a break and so now I am home with conflicting emotions. I miss my job. It is our bread and butter and not taking a paycheck is painful. Being home is weird.

I am not sure if it the weather or all the changes but I am a bit of a wreck. Finding motivation is like looking for a four leaf clover in a field of green. Don't get me wrong I have gotten a few projects done and I am pleased with the progress I am making but some days it is really hard to get on with life.

Today was one of those days. It was windy,cold, rainy and hailed too. I had all day. I could have gotten a lot done. I did not.

Tomorrow is another day and I vow to make it a good one. I have been trying to eat good. I have been exercising 3 times a week, dropped my caloric intake to 1300 calories...stopped drinking alcohol and soda. Haven't lost an ounce! I thought I would lose a pound or two just from switching from soda to water. Nope. Nada. NOT ONE OUNCE!! ahhhhh!

Tomorrow I will post some photos of a project my husband helped me with last night.I couldn't have done it without him.

If you have read this far, you need to get a life~! j/k! But seriously thanks for reading my drama! I will try and make it up to you with some better posts in the future!

I feel better.